wedonot | SEVENTY FOUR ✖ TEXT

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SEVENTY FOUR ✖ TEXT

Just so everyone's aware, I'll be making myself available for anyone who feels that they're in need of counseling in light of what happened.

On a similar note, especially in light of Mark's disappearance, if anyone is interested in volunteering as a counselor to those who might need it, I'd be happy to discuss how to make that work.

[Unless you're a cannibalistic serial killer, in which case you will need to find somewhere else to hang out. :|]

[Filtered to various Friends & Family]

I apologize for not being in touch sooner. I'm alright, and I'd appreciate hearing from you when you've got opportunity.

[Private to Anya]

I hear some congratulations are in order.

[Private to Alex]

Can I come see you?

[ooc: Charles is unaffected by the flood, but if you'd like to be all cuddly and fond with him, I am def up for it. :]b If you think you should be on the filter, you are, and if anyone wants to backdate anything for post-MirrorBarge fallout, I am down!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

In this case, yes it does. Just like Dr. Banner wouldn't feel comfortable letting anyone with a passing interest call themselves a doctor, I'm not comfortable with just anyone calling themselves a therapist. I'm sorry if you have an issue with that, but it isn't something I'm interested in being cavalier with.

...Oh,so it's just a question of semantics? Interesting.

No, it's a question of qualification and training. I'm not trying to suggest that Zane isn't empathetic, [And he's a little offended that that's apparently what you're thinking is happening here.] But empathy alone doesn't mean you're qualified to help someone through serious emotional or mental issues. I really don't understand what the issue is, here.

I'm unclear on who elected you to choose who's suitable and who's not, mainly.

...oh, never mind. It's not like I were about to volunteer. You carry on.

No one elected me, I'm just - to my knowledge - the only one here who has any relevant training in the field of psychology besides Dr. Lecter. I have a degree, and Mark did this for a living. If someone else more qualified than me who isn't a cannibalistic serial killer shows up, I'd be happy to hand the job over and just assist as necessary. I appreciate that Zane wants to help, but this really isn't something that you can just volunteer to do because you want it. It wouldn't be ethical for me to accept the help of someone who's untrained and then put someone's mental and emotional well being in their hands, which again would be the same if I was a medical doctor accepting the help of someone who had only basic knowledge of how to treat an injury and then told them to help reattach a limb.

I understand that you care about Zane and you apparently don't think very highly of me, but if you think this is me trying to shut him out or tell him he isn't capable because I don't trust or like him, you obviously haven't been paying much attention over the entire time he's been here. And if there is some issue between the two of us that I'm not presently aware of, you're welcome to bring it to my attention instead of passive aggressively implying that I'm acting as some sort of tyrant who's unqualified to do his job.

Don't all of us 'ave someone's mental and emotional wellbeing in our 'ands?

I don't think you're unqualified or incapable. You've more'n proved yourself. I think you're being parochial and humanocentric 'ere; but I'm not interested in 'aving a fight over it.

Yes, I'm being human centric. Iris, if you told me that in your culture, Time Lords train therapists by teaching them elaborate dance routines to help their patients and encourage them to have sex with them and that's it, I'd be slightly confused and maybe a little put off because that isn't how I was trained, but I wouldn't forbid you from practicing or write you off entirely because we were trained differently. The issue is that Zane doesn't have training at all, and he offered to use Soothing, which I understand is and can be extremely helpful for someone who's feeling upset and depressed, but that isn't enough when you're dealing with someone who's complating self harm or suicide, or is grappling with mental illness or the abuse they've suffered, and thinking it is enough shows there's some training that would need to happen before I felt comfortable promoting him as a licensed therapist. If I said otherwise, I wouldn't deserve to be here, because it's something that should be taken very seriously.

And while some of us have another person's emotional well being in our hands? Some of us weren't qualified to do that in the first place, and some of us can acknowledge that there are some things we aren't qualified to treat by ourselves, which is part of why Mark and I started offering this, as well as giving wardens someone to talk to who isn't just a friend or family member if they needed it. And it's something that has been on the table for months now, with the same basic qualifications necessary, so I don't understand why my pointing out that some basic training would be required before handing over the reigns is something that's only now posing a problem.

[Iris feels like a car-chasing dog would feel if she unexpectedly caught one; she started in on an impulse borne of generalised bad feelings, and Charles has turned it serious.

She ought to apologise, she thinks, and retreat with what grace she can muster.]

Mmm. You could train 'im.

[A tangent totally counts, right.]

[Not... really, Iris. :c]

And I'm going to, as I said at the beginning of this discussion.

That's really not 'ow it looked to me either. But aye. Good plan. Zane's got a talent for that sort of thing.

Again, something I'm perfectly aware of given our close association over the last eight months, and I apologize for not being clearer. [Although he sounds less sorry and more like he's still pretty furious with her.]

What do you do for fun around 'ere? I mean aside from getting sloshed with Erik once a year and mocking each other's clothes and pickup lines?

[She's equally irritated; but Zane. And she also meant it about not wanting to get in a fight.]

What makes you ask?

'Cause you look like a bloke that's spinning ten plates at once and knows someone'll die when you drop one.

You 'aven't. But it's a worrying thing to see.

Well, it would help if every word out of my mouth wasn't twisted to sound as though I'm some sort of ego maniac refusing to see reason.

[She drops her gaze briefly.]

Sorry. I did go off a bit 'alfcocked there. But it goes back further'n today. I can't remember the last time I saw you looking 'appy.

Maybe that still has something to do with it. It's intensely frustrating trying to be helpful to everyone when you're still recovering, too, only to have people telling you're incapable of doing anything right when you're only trying to ensure that we have the best chance of being happy and healthy that we can, here. I understand that we're all fairly passionate people with strong opinions, but I'm someone who deserves to be treated well, too.

Be fair, love; I specifically said I thought you were very capable. The formal qualifications bit caught me on a bad side, is all.

It might be a bit of a sore spot.

Alright. I'm sorry about the misunderstanding, but I would appreciate it in the future if you thought more carefully before accusing someone of being intentionally mean spirited about something that's been instituted to help people.

Edited 2013-11-10 23:06 (UTC)

I said parochial. Not meanspirited and definitely not intentional. Where the 'eck did you get that from?

Maybe I'm just a person who's capable of having my feelings hurt when I'm being passive aggressively lectured by someone for just trying to do a job I never wanted to be solely responsible for in the first place.

...And that makes it all right just to invent my end of it when I'm trying to apologise? Get stuffed.

No, Iris, I'm attempting to explain where I'm coming from more globally, because this is far from the first conversation I've had like this in the time I've been here. It is exhausting constantly putting myself out there when all I want to do is take Erik and go home, only to have people like you come along and tell me that I'm doing something wrong because I'm not reading your mind and don't know exactly why you're responding to something the way you are. And then when I tried to give some sort of explanation and context as to why this was exceptionally frustrating to hear, or why I've been so visibly unhappy recently, you brushed it off as just me misinterpreting, and then got upset. I'm sorry, but I am tired of constantly being targeted and told off and used as the bloody Barge punching bag because it's convenient to take out your frustrations on me.

You're not 'aving a conversation with everyone, 'ere. Or with "people like me" - who would they be, exactly? You're 'aving it with me. Who 'asn't at any point told you you're doing owt wrong. Nor you didn't make it remotely clear you weren't dismissing Zane out of 'and - I didn't catch on to what you meant till I saw you explain to Anya. The rest of us aren't mind readers either, sunshine.

...Well. Except we are. But you get me meaning.

And you aren't getting mine. I don't know how much clearer I can be about why your attitude frustrated me.

SEVENTY FOUR ✖ TEXT

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