FORTY FOUR ✖ VIDEO

[wedonot]

[So, it's the year anniversary of Charles and Erik being on the Barge. Clearly, the best way to celebrate? Is to get completely wasted.

It's pretty apparent that this is an accidental post: Charles seems to have elbowed the communicator off the table by accident and for a moment, you're getting a good view of the ceiling of the pub and can hear Charles and Erik laughing somewhere close by, but off screen.]

No, no, I'm serious! It works, you have to trust me- [Charles keeps laughing as he leans down and scoops up the communicator, not noticing that it's been turned on and deposits it back on the counter, so now you can see both of them, even if it's still kind of a weird angle. They are both pretty clearly drunk and getting silly, although definitely Charles more so than Erik.] It's, you have to- No I'm serious, Erik, don't make that face at me, just listen-

[Erik is totally making a face and you need to deal with it, he is rolling his eyes and everything.] Come on, Charles, nothing you say will convince me that you have actually found genetics pick up lines useful.

[It's kind of hard to see from this angle, but Charles is making a face back, even though he looks like he's about five seconds away from cracking up, anyway.] Well, I was already in England, so you can't blame the accent.

No, I used to comment on their hair or their eyes or something and say it's a very groovy mutation, and explain that "mutant" is a compliment because mutation took us from single celled organisms to the dominant form of reproductive life on the planet. [He shrugs, still grinning sort of smugly and takes another drink.] Women like an academic.

[It's Erik's turn to laugh and be silly, shaking his head on the edge of the screen.] Emphasis on reproductive life, no doubt. And that works?

[Charles nods and puts his glass down, obviously trying not to grin.] Want to hear another one? I promise it's worked, you should use it sometime.

[Erik just gestures expansively: GO ON. Which is really just making Charles try to hold back laughter again, trying to hold himself together long enough to tell it and more or less half succeeding.]

If I were an enzyme, I'd be a DNA helicase. That way, I could unzip your genes.

[And there is a loud, LOUD groan, and Erik is waving the hand holding his beer about, half threatening to spill it all over, while Charles has completely lost composure and started laughing as Erik responds.] You're joking. You've used that? You must have been slapped at least once!

[Charles shrugs again, still basically giggling.] It gets a laugh if nothing else.

Comments

voice

[tolaywaste]

[ ............ why would you do this to him. Oh my god. ]

Please be lying.

voice

[wedonot]

[Charles actually looks legitimately surprised, because he really didn't know this was on. But oh, hey Alex. C:]

Why would I be lying?

voice

[wecanavenge]

He's not lying.

[chlorophylliac]

...

And God knows women just love sweeping generalizations.

Charles, you're broadcasting.

[wedonot]

Oh.

Sorry, Ivy.

[wecanavenge]

No, this is perfect, settle something for us.

Would that work on you?

[megamind]

...well, the science is sound but I can't say I'd speak the veracity of that line working on any woman with two braincells to rub together.

[wedonot]

Well, now I'm offended on the behalf of several old acquaintances.

[burnmythoughts]

[Jean is holding her head in her hands, laughing so hard it hurts. When she finally looks up at them, she's smirking widely.]

See, now I know why you never take anyone home to the manor. That is awful.

[wedonot]

[Charles isn't sure if he should be offended or start laughing again.] It works, I promise!

[wecanavenge]

Be truthful, Jean. Would you want him to bring someone home?

[technophilic]

I have never understood the comedic value of puns.

[ Because there is none. ]

[wedonot]

You're missing out.

VIDEO look at leslie and know shame

[lesliemonster]

[What is this this is awful and not even your accents and cheekbones and your cheekbone's cheekbones can save you.]

No women like academics [Except Joe Biden, of course.] and this is why and probably you should write the Queen a letter of apology.

VIDEO shame will come tomorrow B(

[wedonot]

Sorry, what? [What does the Queen have to do with this, Leslie?]

[timesbureaucrat]

[Charles, you get this face. Even Narvin thinks that's pretty bad.]

Is that really what passes for courtship?

[wedonot]

Well, not all of it.

[routemistress]

...I'd 'ave to be really drunk, even with your dimples, lovey.

[wedonot]

It works, honestly.

[lost_humanity]

I think I would go the route of, "If you get with me, you'll be (Mg,Fe)₇Si₈O₂₂(OH)₂" if I wanted to choose terrible lines. That one would at least give me time to get out of slapping distance?

[Perfect memories are a bitch. They sometimes get these awful things stuck in them.]

[wedonot]

And yet I've never actually been slapped.

[...] Erik, don't take that as a challenge or a suggestion, I'll make you think you're a woman for a week.

video.

[bloodyamericans]

A laugh of sheer ludicrisity, I hope. [ Because if that ever worked on anyone? No ]

video.

[wedonot]

Sometimes.

[love_slave]

I don't know what a helicase is. Or how it helps unzip genes.

I think they probably like it because you look cute when you're pleased with yourself?

[wedonot]

I suppose that could be it. [He's not sure if that's a compliment or not, but thanks, Zev. C:]

And I can try and explain once I've sobered up.

Spam

[wedonot]

[There was some rational part of him that was pretty aware that tomorrow morning he was going to wish he was dead, but for the time being, Charles was having an excellent time and wasn't overly concerned with the impending hangover.

Right now, the focus was definitely more on making it back to their rooms and whether or not Erik was actually bothering to learn the words to "Ten Thousand Men of Harvard" or if he was just humoring him. This is serious business, Erik. Charles had maybe thrown an arm over his friend's shoulders at some point, which he would deny was for any amount of support if asked, even though he was definitely not even bothering to try walking in a straight line at this point.

And he's singing rather loudly at this point. Sorry, anyone in the vicinity.]

Ten thousand men of Harvard
want victory today,
For they know that o'er old Eli
Fair Harvard holds sway.
So then we'll conquer old Eli's men,
And when the game ends, we'll sing again:
Ten thousand men of Harvard
gained victory today!

[He stops, laughing, and glances over at Erik, grinning. There's definitely been a slur to his words for a while at this point, but he's still a very articulate drunk.] There's also another verse, written in 1953, which is dog Latin. The opening line "illegitimum non carborundum" loosely means "don't let the bastards grind you down." The phrase originally popped up during the Second World War thanks to British army intelligence.

Spam

[wecanavenge]

[Erik was faring slightly better than Charles; he hadn't indulged quite as much, though he wasn't doing much straight line walking of his own. He stumbled through the words with Charles and sang, nodding along and laughing when he couldn't remember some of the words. The explanation took a moment to sink in, because honestly Charles, who gives history lessons when they're smashed?]

I like that, what was it? Illegitmon carbodum? [New motto. 8|]

[fire_punk]

What does any of that even mean? And why would you need to be some kind of special something to unzip a girl's jeans?

[wecanavenge]

It's a genetics joke. DNA? You know what that is, don't you? [Boy what year are you from B(]